You Won’t Understand Now

My flight delay went from 20 minutes to not a number. Everyone at the gate was freaking out and the agents finally said they could no longer help at the gate. I, along with everyone else, raced to the services counter before the lady even finished the sentence “but someone may be able to help you at the serv….”. The line was long, about thirty angry people, and I was still desperate to make my connection to DC at 6 PM. My mom and I figured that the latest I could fly out of here to make that would be around 9:30 AM and it was 9:05. The line was moving so slowly that I knew I was flying solo today with the possibility of a night alone in DC. The flight I was on was now leaving at 4 PM with no more flights to Rome until tomorrow night. My dad called United and they told him they couldn’t do anything. Standing in line, my back started hurting and I felt nauseated—again, I am not the best flyer and I am still running on 4 hours of sleep, a banana, and a single shot mocha. The line was ridiculously long and slow. I think I waited for almost two hours. During that time, I was on the phone with my mom and United. I was determined to get another flight out but they were all overbooked or timed just imperfectly. The people in front of me in line had similar problems and were missing their international connections. Finally at the front, I was able to listen to how everyone was dealing with the agents. There was a woman who was very determined to get to Geneva with her kids and slightly rude to the agent. I understood why but the agent was going to have none of it. She basically waited in line for nothing because I think she is going to remain on the same flight anyway. Finally it was my turn. I was nervous because I got the same agent that was just challenged by grumpy lady. But I was also thankful for the Tylenol and water, by backache was almost gone. I told the agent that I understood I was not going to make DC, however, I needed to get to Rome as soon as possible. She said if I could book another fare that she would be able to change the tickets, cautioning that it was nearly impossible. Armed with phone numbers from her and a few flights I looked up in line, I started calling. No airline could get me there by 1 PM (the deadline) but Lufthansa could get me there by 2—infinitely better than staying over in DC and arriving in Rome two or three days from now. I booked the flight and went back to the agent. She told me I had achieved something very special and to compliment my parents. This woman turned out to be so incredibly helpful and kind, it made my day. There was a minor setback when her computer ceased to function and I was sent to another counter with a grumpy agent who was actually quite mean. He said he was going to report Graciela (the agent lady) because she didn’t follow protocol. I told him she was extremely helpful and am going to call United to clear that issue up. I am finally in possession of my ticket and waiting at the gate for an agent to come so that I can check in for this flight.
I am so grateful for the internet (thanks CEL), my parents, my phone, and my computer. I could not have figured out these flights so fast without them!
I am exhausted, hungry and feeling the effects of extreme stress. I know I will break out in a couple days from all of this. I remember just a few hours ago on the phone when my mom said, “Honey, these things happen for a reason even if you don’t see it now”. I grumpily replied, “I know everything happens for a reason. But I just don’t see or even care to see one right now”. I regret those words. Mom is always right, and look, she strikes again. This experience taught me that I am stronger than I thought I was and that I can survive almost anything. I also realized that, in the scheme of things, missing a flight isn’t really a big deal. No matter what I was going to get to Rome for the experience of a lifetime. I just couldn’t appreciate that in that moment. But, most importantly, God showed me that He has a plan and he smacked me in the face with immense love, care, and support from my parents. Even though they were already home and probably trying to catch up on the sleep that none of us got last night, they stayed up waiting by the phone, made calls for me, and calmed me down when I was freaking out. So, I am humbled, grateful, and loved. I can’t ask for more in this life.
Breathless, Better Than Ezra (also covered by Taylor Swift): “When you feel the world is crashing/ All around your feet/ Come running headlong into my arms/ Breathless/ I'll never judge you/ I can only love you/ Come now running headlong/ Into my arms/ Breathless”.
**Update: Well when I thought it was over.. I was waiting for someone to come to the gate so I could check in and make sure everything was perfect. No one came so I waited and finally asked a woman who was working with someone else. She was extremely nice and told me that the documents in my possession were not tickets. The second guy really screwed up. I had to leave security and go outside to ticketing. I was freaked out because both the security and ticketing lines were very long. So I begged ("I have been here since 6, switched flights, missed my flight to DC...") a woman working first-class ticketing to help me and, thankfully, she did. I finally got my ticket after about a half hour outside security. I ran back and security went smoothly. Since I was no longer making any assumptions whatsoever, I asked the agent at the gate if my boarding pass was correct. I heard the best words, ever, "Yes, everything looks good." I can almost say that I am sitting here, 10 minutes before boarding, relieved. But I'm not quite ready to let my guard down. I am looking forward to this flight though-- I get to go to Germany!! So, in summary, more lessons learned today. People are extremely nice, helpful and competent (mostly) if you just ask for help and nothing is quite the end of the world. Oh yeah, and I'm still stuck on that whole "I'm stronger than I thought I was" thing. :]
"Pair of boots and a sac of clothes/ Free and easy down the road I go/ Someday I know it will take me home" --Dierks Bentley "Free and Easy Down the Road I Go".

Nor Cal Sunrise

I don't know how it happened but I'm finally at the airport.  Somehow all of my stuff fit into 2 checked bags, one carry on, and my purse.  Wait, I lied.  I know how it happened.  My mom is insanely helpful and an she's very good at stuffing suitcases.  :)
Getting out of bed this morning was very difficult.  Something about getting up at about the same time I went to bed back at school is strange.  But now, against my better judgment, I have a cup of coffee and I'm "awake".
San Diego's "sunrise" is really nothing compared to the one I saw this morning.  The clouds were so beautifully and delicately placed in the sky and the sun chased us as we drove into the darkness.  Just sitting there staring in the mirror watching the sun come up and spray the clouds with light was incredibly peaceful.  I am thankful for those quiet 45 minutes in the car with mom, dad, Huck because they were restful and helped calm my nerves a little.  I'm not the best flyer.  But it'll be ok, at the end of two flights and about 11 hours I will be in Rome.  Eye on the prize.
I suppose I will quickly summarize the rest of my pre-Rome summer.  I saw three excellent movies: Toy Story 3, The Book of Eli, and Killers.  They all surprised me in their own way.  Toy Story was just good.  Scary, funny, sad, and deep all at the same time.  I don't like many of the new animated movies and I thought it was great.  Eli was incredibly religious.  It started out a bit slow but the ending was great and it  had a good amount of suspense and thoughtfulness.  And I thought Killers was cute, I'm a sucker for a romantic comedy with a good cast.  It kind of made me want to be a spy.  Don't laugh.
On Tuesday I was able to go the range with dad.  The weather was perfect and we had a great time.  Even cleaning was fun.  Gosh, I missed the smell of gunpowder and that cleaning stuff.  If I had to describe the smell, it's a bit chemical-y, slightly intoxicating.  But don't trust me, I love the smell of gasoline and nail polish.  Haha, maybe that's why I'm crazy...
After that, we had some great bbq.  This place called Dickies.  So so so good.  The place originated in Texas-- finally, they are sharing their wonderful food with us in Cali.
I decided that this post is becoming incredibly long and boring.  Fast.  But I am going to keep writing because my flight is delayed an hour.  So I have nothing better to do, but if you do, please stop reading.  Wow, I lied again.  I have a ton of reading to do.  I really don't want to.  I'll do it later.  I promise.
I wanted my Ke$ha CD out of my car which was at the shop yesterday.  I called ahead and went over in my mom's car, Huck in tow.  Windows down, radio on, and the sun shining down-- we had a great quick drive.  On the way back home, "Love Story" came on the radio.  "We were both young when I first saw you/ I close my eyes and the flashback starts", I decided that Huckleberry is my Romeo.  I freaking love that dog.  Yesterday evening, after marathon packing, my mom and I walked him.  It was just about dusk, super quiet and beautiful.
One of the blogs I follow, Good Morning and Good Night, posted this yesterday:

“It’s funny how one summer can change everything. It must be something about the heat and the smell of chlorine, fresh cut grass and honeysuckle, asphalt sizzling after late-day thunderstorms, the steam rising while everything drips around it. Something about long, lazy days and whirring air conditioners and bright plastic flip flops from the drugstore thwacking down the street. Something about fall being so close, another year, another Christmas, another beginning. So much in one summer, stirring up like the storms that crest at the end of each day, blowing out all the heat and dirt to leave everything gasping and cool. Everyone can reach back to one summer and lay a finger to it, finding that exact point when everything changed.” ~Sarah Dessen

I feel like this is my summer.  This one summer can change everything.
Well, that is poetic enough to end on without a doubt.  But I feel the urge to conclude with song lyrics again.  So here is "The Road and the Radio" by Kenny Chesney: "Clarity and inspiration/ Happiness is a destination that's hard to find/ It may take some time/ But in my mind there's something more/ And I'll open up a brand new door/ And find the strength to close the ones I left behind/ And I'll get there leanin' on some friends I know/ The road and the radio".  I don't think I ever lost happiness, so I don't need to find it.  I feel so blessed, it is overwhelming.  But there is something to these lines.  Clarity, inspiration, and happiness are things that we all strive for and all want in larger quantities.  And maybe that is why we're here.  Maybe these are small components of the essence of humanity.  I think that is what God begins in us here, and will complete someday in heaven.  Happy thoughts. :]
I am sorry that was so long, but be happy.  I am going to stop writing now even though I have two more hours here.  Thank you flight delays. 
Actually, I am thankful to even get internet.  Thanks, dad for sharing the T-mobile account.  I would be very sad without internet right now.
Maybe I can start this reading...

Berries & Cream

I realized that blogging is for narcissists.  Oh well, I am writing this for me.. and my one fan, you know who you are ;).  I just sat down with some of my mom’s lemon cake.. and remembered a book I saw today in the Santa Cruz bookstore, The Particular Sadness of Lemon Cake.  Hahaha, I wonder what that is about because this cake is quite the opposite of particularly sad.

Today was Father’s Day and, like every other weekend, my parents planned a day at dog beach.  This was my first adventure there since they discovered this place shortly after I left for school.  It was nothing like a San Diego beach, that’s for sure, but the weather was great and Huck had a wonderful time.  He never looks happier than when he is attacking a wave.

We had some amazing food at an old favorite seafood place and my mom and I shared some berries and cream for the second day in a row.  The day before was an impromptu brunch and today for dessert.  There is something magical about berries and Chantilly or mascarpone whipped cream—so easy, sweet and summery that it reminds me of a few country songs.

The drive home was nice, good conversation, coffee, and radio.  I was granted the responsibility of DJ so I found a station that played chill, beach music when our country station had too much static.  The lineup was “All In” by Lifehouse, “Who Knew” by Pink and then a song evidently from my parent’s time, “Karma Chameleon” by Boy George.  I was trying to identify the song in my head when I was startled by two voices, in sync, “I'm a man without conviction/ I'm a man who doesn't know/ How to sell a contradiction/ You come and go”.  Gotta love my parents.  I was going to find a different song quote to end with, but my mind is still trying to make sense of this one.  I never thought this would happen but, yes, I am closing tonight with Boy George.  And look at that, I just finished the lemon cake.